In another brazen attempt to rewrite American constitutional law, former President Donald Trump's executive order targeting birthright citizenship got absolutely destroyed in federal court, as it should. This latest shitshow perfectly exemplifies Trump's continued assault on fundamental constitutional rights and his administration's complete inability to understand basic constitutional law.

Trump's executive order, which would have gone into effect on February 19, tried to pull off what many legal scholars are calling a complete bastardization of the 14th Amendment. The order aimed to deny automatic citizenship to children born in the United States if neither parent was a U.S. citizen or lawful permanent resident. This would have impacted roughly 150,000 newborns annually - you know, just casual discrimination against thousands of innocent babies.

Federal Judge John Coughenour, a Reagan appointee (yeah, a fucking Reagan appointee), didn't just block this order - he dragged it through the mud. And I should also point out that he did it literally, faster than you can fucking blink. He did not even bat an eye , VICIOUSLY calling it "blatantly unconstitutional". Coughenour issued a temporary 14-day restraining order that prevented its implementation nationwide. When a Reagan-appointed judge is telling Trump to sit down and shut the fuck up, and that his ideas are trash, you know shit's got real.

The challenge came from a coalition of four states:

Their legal argument cited Supreme Court precedent from 127 years ago that explicitly established that children born to non-citizen parents in the US are entitled to citizenship.

For those wondering why this order was dead on arrival, let's break down the 14th Amendment's citizenship clause like we're explaining it to Trump himself:

"All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States."

That's it. That's the whole damn thing. It doesn't say "except if Trump doesn't like your parents" or "unless a reality TV star turned wannabe dictator says he hates you and you should go the fuck away." It's crystal clear, which makes this whole episode even more embarrassing for the former president.

In a move surprising absolutely nobody, the Justice Department announced plans to defend this steaming pile of unconstitutional garbage and appeal the ruling.

Let's talk numbers:

This isn't the first time Trump has tried to mess with birthright citizenship. Back in 2018, he claimed he could end birthright citizenship with an executive order, prompting widespread ridicule from constitutional scholars.

A hearing for a potential longer-term preliminary injunction is scheduled for February 6, though given the judge's initial response, Trump's team might want to save themselves the embarrassment. Legal experts are already predicting another judicial beatdown, with some suggesting this might be one of the easiest cases of constitutional law they've ever seen.

This latest episode in Trump's ongoing war against the Constitution serves as yet another reminder of his fundamental misunderstanding of American law and his willingness to trample on constitutional rights for political gain. As one legal scholar put it, "This isn't just unconstitutional, it's unconstitutional in crayon."